Suffering loss is difficult any time of year, but when it is at Christmastime, it brings a deeper meaning to the season.
I had the privilege of attending a beautiful memorial service three days after Christmas. My daughter-in-law’s father died on the 22nd after several months of failing health. Our families have been friends for more than two decades so the loss was real and painful for our family.
In the midst of loss and sorrow, God showed up to honor a life that had been released to Him.
Many came to the service to pay their respects. The church was filled to overflowing with family and friends who loved him and shared the family’s grief. The church pews were filled and the tremendous parking lot could not accommodate all of the cars.
When you entered the sanctuary of the church, you encountered an 80+ pound bull dog laying near the back of the church. No one knew who he belonged to but he acted as if he had been invited because he wandered throughout the sanctuary during the service. It brought some humor to the grieving crowd. *
The church, still decorated for Christmas, added a peaceful backdrop for what was to be one of the most amazing memorial services I had ever attended.
When the service began, the crowd immediately was reduced to tears by the beautiful music. The vocalist melted hearts with her song, her guitar accompanying in the background. Beside me sat two of my three grandsons whose sobs could be heard throughout the church. Hearts were broken by the loss. Our youngest grandson was so upset he moved to sit with his mom in front of me. My middle grandson who had been sitting with his mother, moved back with me and climbed into my lap, staying there for the remainder of the service. My eldest grandson sat between his aunt and me, leaning back and forth between us for comfort, sobbing silently.
They missed their Pop and so did everyone else. His stature and personality made him bigger than life and his passing left a gaping hole in the lives of family and friends.
My daughter- in-law, her brother and brother-in-law individually stood bravely before the crowd sharing stories of their sweetest moments with their father and father-in-law. He loved to laugh and the stories reminded us of his sense of humor and caring approach to life. It became a celebration of a life well lived. He would have wanted it to be that way.
I watched the face of his bride of forty years as she sat in front of me. She deeply grieved her loss but the stories brought a smile as she remembered.
Then, just before the message, the huge bulldog wandered to the front of the church, passed the altar and walked to the back again. It was good to laugh.
My husband officiated the memorial service. His words gave the congregation freedom; freedom to grieve, but also to have hope.
“We press into the grief and give it its full due. It’s part of being human; it is as much a part of how God created us as anything else….We will not “get over” his loss. But, we will learn to live with it. We will heal and rebuild ourselves around the loss we have suffered. We will be whole again, but we will never be the same. “
So we live with hope. The legacy that was left behind by Pop will leave a lasting impression on family and friends, forever. He will not be forgotten because his legacy lives on in the people left behind.
That’s what love does. Love changes us.
Rest In Peace, Will.
*We found out at the end of the day that the dog who wandered the service and reception did in fact belong to someone in attendance.
Stories Changing Lives