Author: Carol Gibbs

Whoever thought that we would be in quarantine for so long? 

It is in times such as these that we think about and appreciate more deeply those moments that came before. 

I adore my family and friends and miss them terribly. And though we have Skyped, Face Timed, Zoomed and called, it is just not enough for me. 

We are fortunate to live in the same town as our older son’s family and have been able to watch our grandchildren play…at a distance. But, it’s just not enough to be a bystander. I want to hug them and chase them in the yard, and read books with them as they sit with me. I miss that.

I want to hug my daughter-in -law and say “great job” for courageously homeschooling the three boys and chasing their two year old daughter in the process. The kids are so happy and that is a testimony to her efforts. 

I want to hug my son and say l am proud of the way he has stayed home and worked from there. He is protecting his family and loves every moment. 

I want to hug my son and son-in-law for pressing through and teaching their college courses on line. I am thankful they are practicing social distancing by not going to Cross Fit and socializing with their friends over social media only.  

I want to hug my niece who is on the front lines in the medical field selflessly seeing patients every day. She is a hero and so is my nephew and other niece who are serving as well. 

I want to hug our family members and friends who are willing to stay home for the sake of others. That expression of love speaks volumes to me. 

I do get to hug my husband! He has had my undivided attention and most of the time, I think he really enjoys that. I am thankful that we have each other. 

I know this has been a difficult time. It will be worth it in the end. The reunion with loved ones will come soon and it will be sweet. For me, it will require lots of hugs! 

Hang in there, everyone!!

Stay well and God bless, 

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

As human beings, we make thousands of decisions throughout our day. Most decisions are made with very little thought, like a reflex out of our experience. We seldom need to think twice. 

We can make these same kinds of decisions about people, as well. Like a familiar reflex, we can accept, reject, and sometimes not even see them. People can pass through our lives every day and we barely notice. When was the last time you spoke to a person who was outside of your family, circle of friends or workplace? Or you spent time with someone who was unlike you? When did you last interact with a homeless person? Or have a deep conversation with someone from the LGBTQ community? When did you last ask an immigrant about their country of origin?

Too often, we close our eyes to the strangers who cross our paths. We don’t even give them a second look. Why? They are different and it takes time and effort? I believe that the primary reason is fear. Because we are afraid of the unknown, the boundaries we have establish to protect ourselves prevent us from experiencing some of the most beautiful aspects of life… people.

Let me tell you story:

The overwhelming grief of the woman was too intense to keep her away. Her dear friend had been brutally murdered and she found herself running to his grave to mourn. When she arrived, she discovered, to her horror, that her friend’s body was gone.

The woman immediately called to alert her friends. When they arrived, her two friends entered the gravesite as she waited outside. They confirmed what she had believed to be true. He was no longer there. The woman’s  friends expressed their condolences and quickly returned to their day, leaving her standing outside of the gravesite alone.

She stood outside of the gravesite for quite a while. Then, for some unknown reason, felt drawn to go back to the grave for a second look. Maybe, she was wrong. Maybe, they all were wrong. As she entered the darkness once again, she saw before her two people dressed in white sitting where the body was supposed to be resting.

“Where is he? If you have taken him away please tell me. ” She cried. 

“He is not here.” They declared. 

The woman left the grave even more grieved and sobbed as she walked along. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw someone who she believed to be the caretaker of the gravesite. Maybe he might have the answer.

“Why are you crying?” He asked. “Who is it you are looking for?”

Without even looking in his direction, she replied, “Sir, if you have carried him away, please tell me where you have put him, and I will go get him.”

Suddenly, she was startled by the familiar voice as he called her by name, “Mary.” She spun around and before her stood her dear friend, Jesus. He was alive.  

I love this story. Mary had the privilege of being one of the very first people to see Jesus after He rose from the dead. The two disciples saw him much later, but at that moment, they saw what they expected to see, an empty tomb. Mary hoped for more, she paused and took a second look into the darkness. She was looking for Jesus and she found Him. 

When we allow ourselves to pause and take a second look, we too can see Jesus. He is in the people all around us but we must be willing to put aside our expectations, open our eyes… and take a second look.

This Easter season, take a second look. You may be surprised by what you see.

Happy Easter, my friends.

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

By Jim Gibbs

As we thoughtfully consider the challenges brought on by this global pandemic, let us realize this: 

COVID-19 does not know:

* if we are republican or democrat;

* whether we are pro-life or pro-choice;

* where we were born; our citizenship; or if we are an immigrant;

* our skin color — whether we are black, brown or white;

* our age;

* whether we are privileged or marginalized;

* our professions and the value we might place on others;

* our sexual orientation;

* if we are male, female or transgender;

* our wounding or sufferings;

* whether we have physical, emotional or mental health issues;

* if we are incarcerated, imprisoned in a refugee camp or other holding camps because of our nationality or ethnicity;

* whether we are racist, misogynist, homophobic or not;

* if we think we are invincible or we know we clearly are not;

** or our faith and religious affiliations. 

COVID-19 does not discriminate based on any of the things that divide us (many of which are listed above) in our families, neighborhoods, work places, regions, countries and in the world.

Today, all COVID-19 knows is that singular thing that unites us all and which everyone holds in common — our humanity.

Can we not use this realization that, in our humanity, we are equally and unconditionally loved by the Creator? Each one of us has equal worth, and deserves similar love and respect. 

Let us not let our divisions prevent us from uniting to do all things that the public health experts tell us, plead with us, to do.

Let us not waste this opportunity to emerge from this crisis more united; more committed to compassionate interaction with everyone on this planet; more committed to kindness and care for the marginalized; those who are poor and suffer from injustice.

If we squander this opportunity, then the collective efforts of the first responders; policemen, doctors, nurses, pharmacists and others will be for naught. From the sanitation workers who collect our refuse, to the grocery clerks, restaurant employees, and delivery workers (and others similarly serving), all are serving to protect us. They provide the critical services that allow us, and everyone else on Earth, to weather this pandemic —Each of them collectively and courageously stand in harm’s way so we do not have to. All of their efforts will have been for naught, as will their sickness and deaths and those of our loved ones, if we fail to comply and unite in our humanity.

I urge you to thoughtfully and courageously embrace our shared humanity and live it out.

Much love,

Jim Gibbs

Over the last few years, I have watched as the world slowly lives in more and more disunity. Sadly, the U.S. is among those who have alienated faithful allies. Why? Has self-absorption, pride and greed been the cause? 

As the world strives to meet the challenges of the coronavirus, I am beginning to see a new hope. Scientists from every nation are working together to find the best way to fight the virus. Each country brings something of value to ending the pandemic. 

I am, also, seeing countries who are moving past the virus, assisting struggling countries. China is sending millions of masks, medical supplies and experts to Italy, Liberia, Philippines, Czech Republic, Cambodia and Serbia. They have given $20 million dollars to the World Health Organization to help fight the virus. China knows the value of support, as they received medical supplies from 80 countries when the outbreak began. *

And though many believe China mishandled the outbreak poorly, which is why we are all suffering, they are making an effort to support others in the world. Is it a political move? Maybe, but regardless of the motivation, lives are being saved.

I pray that this humanitarian crisis reminds us of the things that are most important; compassion, kindness, and love for all people. 

May the Creator of this great world bring protection, hope and healing to us all. 

Stay well, my friends.

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

* Some of this information was taken from “It Takes a World to End a Pandemic”, The Foreign Affairs Journal, March 21, 2020.

If you are a super extrovert and are feeling a little isolated right now, I understand that completely. This has been a difficult time for many people who find themselves hunkered down at home because of the threat of the coronavirus. For the introverts among us, it is a welcome seclusion. It’s time to recharge and catch up on reading, etc. But for those of us who recharge with others, we must be intentional about connecting in other ways. 

Usually, at a time like this, I would find myself running to seek the company of my grandchildren. I normally wouldn’t mind their very sloppy colds… but my husband is going through chemo treatments and his system is already compromised…so we wait to spend time with our older son’s family. 

In the midst of it all, our younger son, who lives down south, comes for a long visit. It was wonderful to see him and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. For that, we are so very thankful.  

In these uncertain times, stay strong and find creative ways to connect with loved ones; phone calls, write notes, email, facetime. Today, we can’t wait to Facetime with our grandchildren.

Stay well my friends. This too shall pass. 

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

The deepening of one’s faith can be a complicated process. The faith you experienced growing up may not offer a clear explanation for what you see reflected in our culture today. Though you lack understanding, you resist asking the questions for fear of judgement. You might even leave the church over it. 

But when you finally allow yourself to ask questions, where do you go for answers? 

First, don’t be afraid to bring your questions to God. Allow Him to guide you through this process. After all, it is all about Him. 

There are many books out there that might be helpful in clarifying some thoughts. One that has been helpful to me is Heart and Mind, by Alexander Shaia. Shaia invites you on a journey of understanding the gospels in a new way, through the lens of “re-centering human life on wisdom, compassion and service.” All is “rooted in a mystical relationship with Christ.”

Don’t be afraid to address your questions. There is nothing you and God can’t handle together. 

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

It would be all too easy for me to be overwhelmed with the challenges of this life…but, I choose to:

Receive each new day as a gift. 

Cherish every person along the way. 

Believe I am loved.

Trust that God has my back.

And Love like it matters for all eternity.

Receive-Cherish-Believe-Trust-Love

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

The Ally Partnership

In this incredible world of diversity, there is a darkness that blinds us from recognizing the beauty and value of all humanity. We are held hostage by our misconceptions, prejudices and fears. How do we break free? 

There is hope in the darkness. Beacons of light shine amongst us revealing the goodness of mankind. These courageous ones are moved by the people before them. They see into the human heart and respond with compassion. They understand their responsibility to partner for justice. They are Allies.

Dismantling Perceptions That Lead to Injustice is a collection of compelling stories that illustrate the power of partnership. When people are committed to justice, and personally invest in others, they offer hope and transform lives. 

May this book inspire a new vision for “others” that challenges our perceptions and brings change to our world.

I am still in the process with this book. In the meantime, you can read my first book, Who Do You Say I Am? Personal Life Stories Told by the LGBTQ.

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

I am so very thankful for my life. My husband, children, grandchildren, family and friends are amazing blessings to me. There is great joy in our times together.

However, life does not always feel like a celebration. But, I have found that it is in those most difficult moments that we experience things we can nowhere else and when people dare to accompany us through those times, we experience the extraordinary love of God. 

This has been an incredibly difficult season of life for our family. I shared with you in my last post about the loss of a dear friend and the father of my daughter-in-law. In addition, over the course of the last month, our two year old granddaughter broke her arm, our five year old grandson had a suspicious mole on his head requiring plastic surgery, everyone got the stomach flu, and the most recent, my husband’s unexpected surgery to remove an intestinal blockage discovered a reoccurrence of cancer. He now has a regiment of chemo before him. It’s felt much like the story of Job. 

Last week, as I sat in the hospital room with a friend who was visiting my husband, and I listened closely as he shared about the joys of his holiday season, his words pierced my heart and I began to ask myself “why”.  Why was life so wonderful for others while our family was experiencing so much hardship? 

A dark cloud began to cover my heart following that time. I found myself angry inside, wanting to lash out but keeping it hidden. Where was God through all of this? Did He see what we were going through? Did He even care? 

Then, I remembered…I began to reflect on the beautiful expressions of love I had experienced over the last few weeks. I remembered the many phone calls, texts, visits, meals, pastors bringing communion and prayers on our behalf. I remembered our older son spending two nights in the hospital with my husband so I could recover from the stomach flu at home. I reflected on our dear daughter-in-law carrying the full responsibility of their four children so our son could be freed up for us. I remembered my sister spending nights at my house to care for me, providing ginger ale and soda crackers. I remembered my brother and brother-in-law who spent two entire days with my husband, just watching over him while I couldn’t. I remembered my younger son leaving his demanding work schedule out-of-state to be present here at home. This speaks love to me and I will never forget the kindnesses expressed. 

Last week is behind, thank goodness, and this week has been much better. My husband is recovering quickly from the surgery and is at home. My granddaughter’s arm has healed, the mole on my grandson’s head is benign, and the stomach issues are gone. When I think about all we have endured, I am thankful. I am thankful for the extraordinary love that I have experienced. 

And though there will be several months of chemo ahead for my husband, we go forth with hope knowing that God sees us and will respond with His extraordinary love.

I am certain that there are many of you who are struggling to see goodness in your life today. Life can be so difficult sometimes and we can’t do it alone. Identify those people in your life who care about you and are willing to help carry your burden…do it together. 

May you experience the fullness of God’s love today and always. 

Blessings,

Carol Marchant Gibbs

Stories Changing Lives

Suffering loss is difficult any time of year, but when it is at Christmastime, it brings a deeper meaning to the season.  

I had the privilege of attending a beautiful memorial service three days after Christmas. My daughter-in-law’s father died on the 22nd after several months of failing health. Our families have been friends for more than two decades so the loss was real and painful for our family. 

In the midst of loss and sorrow, God showed up to honor a life that had been released to Him. 

Many came to the service to pay their respects. The church was filled to overflowing with family and friends who loved him and shared the family’s grief. The church pews were filled and the tremendous parking lot could not accommodate all of the cars.

When you entered the sanctuary of the church, you encountered an 80+ pound bull dog laying near the back of the church. No one knew who he belonged to but he acted as if he had been invited because he wandered throughout the sanctuary during the service. It brought some humor to the grieving crowd. *

The church, still decorated for Christmas, added a peaceful backdrop for what was to be one of the most amazing memorial services I had ever attended. 

When the service began, the crowd immediately was reduced to tears by the beautiful music. The vocalist melted hearts with her song, her guitar accompanying in the background. Beside me sat two of my three grandsons whose sobs could be heard throughout the church. Hearts were broken by the loss. Our youngest grandson was so upset he moved to sit with his mom in front of me. My middle grandson who had been sitting with his mother, moved back with me and climbed into my lap, staying there for the remainder of the service. My eldest grandson sat between his aunt and me, leaning back and forth between us for comfort, sobbing silently. 

They missed their Pop and so did everyone else. His stature and personality made him bigger than life and his passing left a gaping hole in the lives of family and friends. 

My daughter- in-law, her brother and brother-in-law individually stood bravely before the crowd sharing stories of their sweetest moments with their father and father-in-law. He loved to laugh and the stories reminded us of his sense of humor and caring approach to life. It became a celebration of a life well lived. He would have wanted it to be that way. 

I watched the face of his bride of forty years as she sat in front of me. She deeply grieved her loss but the stories brought a smile as she remembered. 

Then, just before the message, the huge bulldog wandered to the front of the church, passed the altar and walked to the back again. It was good to laugh. 

My husband officiated the memorial service. His words gave the congregation freedom; freedom to grieve, but also to have hope.

“We press into the grief and give it its full due. It’s part of being human; it is as much a part of how God created us as anything else….We will not “get over” his loss. But, we will learn to live with it. We will heal and rebuild ourselves around the loss we have suffered. We will be whole again, but we will never be the same. “

So we live with hope. The legacy that was left behind by Pop will leave a lasting impression on family and friends, forever. He will not be forgotten because his legacy lives on in the people left behind. 

That’s what love does. Love changes us. 

Rest In Peace, Will. 

*We found out at the end of the day that the dog who wandered the service and reception did in fact belong to someone in attendance.

Stories Changing Lives